From the time you turn about 15, the phrase "be the bigger person" is directed at you whenever you bow up in defense or hurt or frustration. At least in my experience, anytime I felt extreme emotion or passion about a certain situation, I was asked (or told) (or expected) to "be the bigger woman". Well thanks to all of my wonderful friends and family, I may be the biggest woman I know. And to be frank, I'm not so sure I'm proud of that fact.
What is so wrong with feeling things deeply and holding grudges against people that really, truly, deeply wounded you? Is it not human nature to protect yourself from danger? In learning to be the "bigger woman" I have learned avoidance... which is something I always avoided. I pride myself in meeting challenges head-on... in handling what needs to be handled to move on. Now, because it's so "big" of me, I smile and say "you're right"... "I understand completely"... "of course you are making the right choice by smashing my hopes and dreams"... "I agree that I'm not the girl for you". In being the "bigger woman", I've belittled myself. I've started to believe the things that are thrown at me that I deflect so that everyone can be happy.
Here's me, big or little. Don't tell me what I can and can't do... I'm a strong woman who can break through doors and tear down walls. Don't say I'm not good enough... I'm a confident woman who knows I'm much better than you give me credit for. Don't criticise me for my trials and failure... I'm an independent woman who can stand on my own two feet and appreciates the good things in life.
I hope this doesn't ruffle any feathers... if so, know that I think you're right... I understand completely... etc... etc...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment